Back to Reality.. 2 Weeks Ago


Isn’t it sad how quickly time on holiday passes? Feels like just yesterday my mate P and I were headed down to Brighton for the weekend.

Meanwhile it’s been almost two weeks since we left and went out separate ways once back in London, with him heading home to Scotland.

Or maybe it seems like it passed quickly because we had a great time… though to be honest it didn’t really feel like we did much while we were there.

As usual when we go to Brighton, we headed to the nude beach on a couple of the afternoons.. which sadly wasn’t a good thing.

Despite the lovely sunny days (only rained on the Monday and briefly on the Saturday), it was way too cold for the beach.  Let alone taking it all off on the nude beach.

PARKA ON THE BEACHIn fact, the wind was so chilly there were maybe a handful of die-hards on the beach.  And there was even a guy sitting naked on the beach.. wearing a parka.

Yeah.. it was that cold. Dammit.

So instead we ended up spending more time drinking and chatting on a couple different terraces overlooking the sea.  And ended up getting farmer tans instead of the all over ones we’d wanted. Hahaha

Overall it just seemed like we chilled out all weekend really.  Sure, we went to the various bear parties for the Brighton Bear Weekender, but we didn’t really party like we had in past years.

Maybe we’re just getting old.  😉

To be fair, neither of us were really that bothered by the parties as it was more about hanging out together.  We went to most of them (skipped the underwear party at the underground kink club on the Sunday lol), but didn’t really get into the party atmosphere of the weekend.

In fact, when we say the pics of the weekend and the various parties/events, we weren’t in a single picture… making it almost seem like we weren’t there.

But to be honest, it wasn’t much of a surprise to not see pics of us.  The guys taking the pics all weekend only seemed to take shots of the party bears or the people they already knew.

Or maybe we didn’t do anything to really stand out from the crowds.  Maybe we stayed on the sidelines too much.

There were some who went out of their way to stand out, from outlandish outfits to a group of American bears who stripped to their underwear to dance on the podium Friday night just to get their picture taken.

Ready to goPersonally I didn’t even think they were that good looking to warrant the attention, but most of the guys had their mobiles out taking pics of them.  To each their own I suppose.

Anyway.. in the end, we enjoyed our annual weekend away for our birthdays, albeit a week early.  And we were both surprised how neither of us drank or ate too much.  So not like us at all.  LOL

I mentioned to P how next year maybe we should take a pass on the bear weekend thing.. and maybe give them all a pass in general.  Neither of us really feel like we fit in with the bear crowds, so seems pointless to spend so much money on these parties each year.

Well, we’ll see what happens.. meanwhile P’s suggested I come up to Edinburgh in October for the BearScots again.

So much for taking a break from the bears, huh?  LOL

Singledom Complications


Sometimes I just don’t understand gay men .. and I definitely include myself in that statement!

Over the past little while, my social (aka – sex) life has gotten a bit complicated.  Or at least it seems more complicated than I’d like it to be to me.

As I mentioned in a previous post (click HERE to read), I’ve been spending a bit of time over the past couple months with a sweet Italian bear.  Mostly it’s about enjoying each other’s company, hanging out, watching movies, and getting lots of cuddles.  I’d known for awhile that he fancied me, and although I don’t feel the same for him, I have enjoyed his company.

Then came the house-warming party a few weeks back (he and a couple friends recently moved into a new place)…

sexy hairy manOne of the guests was a sexy Italian chaser I’ve known for a couple years now but never had much opportunity to get to know.  We used to chat online awhile back, but nothing ever came of it.

Basically it was one of those connections where we were attracted to each other, but just ended up as ships passing in the night.

As soon as I arrived at the party, the chaser was on me like a house on fire.  I’d barely taken off my coat before his hand was on my ass and his tongue was down my throat.

Oh man.. that first kiss was so damn electric!!

Long story short, we spent the rest of the night sneaking kisses, with me being overly conscious of whose house we were in.  The last thing I wanted to do was to upset our mutual friend.

But eventually as we both got a bit tipsy, caution was thrown to the wind and we were full on making out in the middle of the kitchen.  Some of the other guests joked that we should ‘get a room’.

Since the party, the chaser and I have met up a couple times, and the electricity from that first kiss carried into the bedroom (sorry, no gory details.. not that type of blog lol). I found being in his company quite easy and comfortable.. and I think he felt the same, but who knows with some guys.

Gay_Couple_togetherness_in_bed_01I haven’t talked to the Italian bear about all this yet, but apparently the chaser has told him we’ve spent some time together.  I may be over-thinking it, but am just a bit worried that he’ll feel hurt that I’m now sleeping with his friend.. though he knows we both like each other.

Oh who knows.

Now here’s where I’m getting confused in regards to the chaser.. and myself I suppose.

There’s been no discussion as to what this is between us, whether it’s just a bit of fun or if there’s possibility of something more.  Sure, he’s vaguely mentioned about getting together again, but nothing’s been set in stone.

As I left his place Friday night, he said I could come along the next night to a 80’s synth-pop night in the city.  For some reason, I took that as an invite, but he clarified the next day that it was more I could ‘tag along’ if I was interested.

Instead of sitting at home over-analysing it, I went along and we had a great time with a couple of his friends.  We danced all night, sang horribly as we tried to remember the words to the music, and generally had a great night.

And he was such a flirt. With both me and another guy with us. :-/

jealousy2I tried not to, but I starting feeling jealous whenever they were flirty.  And a pang of disappointment at the end of the night when I had to find a night bus for the epically long journey home.. and they went off to catch the same bus.

I dunno if they went home together.. and not sure if I want to know.

What I do know is I do like this guy, both in and out of the bedroom.  I find him interesting, engaging and sexy as hell.  I am trying to just take things as they come, but it’s not easy for me..  I suppose I just wish I knew what he thought about us – or even if there is an ‘us’.

Sometimes it just feels like we’re tiptoeing around each other, playing the gay mating game to some extent (a mate recently said he thought my sex life was starting to sound like a gay ‘Game of Thrones’ lol).

Perhaps I’m over complicating things in my head by letting my thoughts/feelings get away from me. Or perhaps I’m just so desperate to find someone special that I’m jumping at the first guy in a long time that’s shown me any interest (applies to both of the Italians I think..).

*Sigh* Why does being single have to be so damn complicated? LOL


Where’s the Bears at, Manchester?


So here we are, my best mate P and I, half way through our trip to Manchester.  And over the past couple nights we’ve been asking ourselves – and each other – the same thing..

Where the hell are all the damn bears????

I’d always heard/assumed that Manchester had a big bear community, especially since the annual British Bear Bash party is (was?) one of the biggest in the UK. Kind of a safe assumption I’d say, right?

But imagine our surprise to arrive in Manchester and there’s no dedicated bear bar or pub. That when we’ve asked around as to where to go, we’re directed to a bar full of leather men and guys wearing latex (think there was a fetish party going on somewhere), and to the prerequisite Eagle which just wasn’t that busy. 

Maybe we’re missing something. Maybe there’s some hidden gem of a bear bar that nobody’s telling us about (and is so hidden you can’t even find it on the Internet lol). 

Maybe there just aren’t any guys in Manchester either of us would find attractive. Maybe they’ve all moved away. Lol

Or maybe there really isn’t that big of a scene here after all (Growlr would say otherwise…). Or maybe they’re all partnered off and sitting at home on a Friday night. 

I dunno.  All I do know is we’ve both been pretty underwhelmed by the city so far, and that’s disappointing. It’s not a horrible city at all, in fact it’s quite clean and seems nice.. but just doesn’t seem like there’s anything to do. 

Other than drink and shop.

Or maybe I’m just so used to London (and P used to Glasgow/Edinburgh) where there’s always something to do, something touristy, something fab and interesting. 

Or maybe we’re just missing something. 

Oh well, still another couple days to go. Hopefully something interesting will pop up.. Once we finally crawl out of bed with our hangovers. 😉

To Beard or Not to Beard


hipster beard2Does anyone else out there think the whole beard trend has gone a bit too far?  Am I the only one who’s tired of pretty much every guy out there has a beard of some sort?

Of course, that is probably an over-exaggeration, but we’ve gotten to a point where most guys have a beard or scruff of some sort.  And it’s not like it’s their day off and didn’t need to shave.

Personally, I love nothing better than a sexy man with a nice beard or stubble.  For some guys, it’s what may actually make them sexy in the first place.  I know I’ve looked at pictures of guys with and without beards, and thought they looked a lot better with one.  Not that they were ugly or unattractive without.

I suppose it’s all a matter of wanting that perceived masculinity in a partner, that the beard somehow makes him seem more virile.  That the beard makes him seem more of a man.

And for awhile, at least for me, it made it a bit easier to identify beary or bear-friendly guys.  😉  You rarely found a twink or some muscle queen with a nice, full beard.

Unfortunately these days, with the social acceptance of facial hair over the past few years it’s gotten to the point where you can’t throw a cat without hitting a guy with a beard, and not just in the gay community.

Beards Keep You Young, Healthy & Handsome, Says Science – World Observer Online.

In fact, as I sit in the coffee shop writing this, out of the 8 guys in my immediate vicinity, only one doesn’t have any kind of facial hair… then again he’s 10 years old and hasn’t hit puberty yet.  Lol

beard spelledI’ve seen guys of all walks of life with big bushy beards, gay and straight.  But the thing that bothers me so much these days is how this whole beard trend has been taken to the extreme.  To the point where there are some damn ugly beards out there, all because they think it’s ‘cool’ and ‘trendy’.

Take the hipster look – a generally skinny guy, with odd clothes, and now with a huge bushy lumberjack beard.  This is a common look for a lot of guys living in East London.  And on some guys it can look super HAWT!  But on most it looks like they’re auditioning for some film about the Amish.

I recently read an article on The Guardian website that suggested that perhaps we’ve reached ‘peak beard’ – that a man’s attractiveness to potential partners may fade as facial hair becomes more prevalent.

Fashion-conscious men warned we may have reached ‘peak beard’ | Fashion | The Guardian

Is this true, or just a matter of some fashionista not liking beards so is hoping to get people to start shaving again?  Or is it just a matter of pointing out the obvious, that this trend will too pass?

Interestingly there was a conversation about beards at a picnic I attended recently, where the majority of the guys there were clean shaven or just hadn’t shaved that day and only a couple of us with full on beards.  Most of the guys there just associated beards with the bear community, and one guy went so far as to say that smooth-faced guys are quickly becoming the more desired since too many guys out there have facial hair now.

Paul_BunyanTo be honest, it’s a thought I’ve had many times myself over the past while.  Usually when I’m standing in front of the mirror dreading trimming my beard to ensure it doesn’t go all Paul Bunyon-like.  LOL

Hell, I’ve come very VERY close to just shaving the entire thing off in a fit of frustration .. and probably laziness.  Haha.  Though I think I’d look quite weird without a full beard – I’ve sported one for close to 10 years now!

Anyway, regardless of the ‘peak beard’ effect or whether fashion trends will swing back towards clean-shaven men, they’ll always be somewhat trendy and prevalent in the bear community.

And yes, damn sexy. 😉

Away on Holidays


20140619-023608-9368847.jpg Hey everyone.. Things will be a bit quiet here until early/mid next week, as I’m off on holiday. I’m headed down to Brighton, about an hour south of London, for an extended weekend with my best mate from Scotland. We’re going down for our annual (bar last year) trip to the seaside for the bear weekend and to celebrate our birthdays.. Even if it is a week early.

I had planned on scheduling a couple of posts for while I was away, but unfortunately didn’t get the ones finished that I had hoped. It’s been one of those weeks I suppose..

So I hope everyone is enjoying the summer so far.. And hopefully I’ll have some fun, interesting and maybe a few naughty tales to tell when I get back. Lol