I don’t know why it is, but whenever I meet someone new romantically (for lack of a better word…), I somehow end up getting super attached a lot quicker than I’d like.
It’s something that has occurred for me many times over the years, and despite me actively trying NOT to do this, it still happens without warning. I can’t seem to help myself.
It’s usually the same old story – meet some cute guy, there’s an instant mutual physical attraction, and we get along like gang-busters. We’ll end up chatting and texting very regularly, with the conversations becoming quite intimate while also getting to know each other.
And yeah, sure.. there’s some great sex. That should be a given. 😉
Once I like a guy, I’m basically done and have no interest in continuing to look around for someone else. I’m always open to seeing if this could potentially be something more than just a casual thing or friendship.
And perhaps it’s that openness to see where things go is what scares them off and causes them to put the brakes on whatever has been going on between us. It’s not like I’m immediately suggesting we get married, but what’s wrong with showing interest in being more than friends-with-benefits?
What I do find interesting (and slightly disturbing) is how I seem to not have any say in where things go between us. How the whole decision whether we should date or not is solely in their hands. How by being so open and honest about what I’d like I’ve somehow given them all the power in whatever ‘relationship’ we’re in.
Messed up, huh?
What can I say. I wear my heart on my sleeve, even when I’m trying not to. Even when I’m trying to be cold and distant as a way to play the ‘game’, I still end up being the emotional one. The one who gets their feelings hurt.
It’s just who I am.
And should I really have to change who I am as a person to get a boyfriend or relationship?
I should hope not… if someone likes me, then they should like me for me, not for their idealised version of my personality.
Because isn’t that the whole point of dating and finding a partner in life? To find someone who accepts you for who you truly are, and not try to change you into someone you’re not?
I really hope so… and I really hope that guy shows up soon, before I go all ‘Fatal Attraction’, bunny-boiler on some poor unsuspecting guy.
Kidding… I think. 😉