I’ve written before about how frustrating it is to me that I only seem to meet partnered guys. Like, is there something about me (or more accurately, my online profiles) that screams ‘use me and then go home to your hubby’?
Okay, maybe that’s being a wee bit overly dramatic .. but it does feel that way sometimes.
One of the things I’ve made abundantly clear on my profiles is that I’m not looking to meet or hook up with partnered guys, but yet I still get messages from them. You’d think they’d get the hint when my profiles states ‘Please be single’, or some such thing.
But despite that, I still receive messages from partnered guys and my ‘profile views’ list is full of them as well.
I have partnered friends, so there’s no problem there. It’s just when it comes to dating/sex, I’d prefer that the person wasn’t already accounted for. I don’t mind a bit of fun here and there, but it definitely leaves me a bit empty knowing they’re headed home to their hubby afterwards.
Well back in September or October, I met a sweet guy on one of my profiles… and he’s married, so I made it quite clear through our chats that I wasn’t looking to get involved with a partnered guy. That I was looking to date. He said he understood, so we agreed to meet for a coffee.
Ok, the coffee didn’t last too long before we were heading back to my place for some ‘fun’.
Yes, sleeping with him wasn’t holding to my rule of not getting involved with a partnered guy .. I never said I always held true to it. Rules are made to be broken, right? 😉
Anyway, we seemed to get along fairly well sexually, so we started hooking up every so often (though things stopped while I was figuring things out with the guy in Luxembourg.. but that’s another posting later), and it was nice to have a fuck-buddy (FWB?) who liked to cuddle afterwards.
Problem is, over the past couple of months, he’s been saying things like ‘I miss your kisses’, or ‘I miss being with you’ .. or the best one yet, after reminding him it was just a bit of fun, ‘What if I wasn’t married?’.
Or even better, one Friday night he texted me to say he was jealous when I was out with friends (a couple) for dinner and drinks.
Yep.. he was getting attached, whereas I was just looking at it for what it was: SEX. Plain and simple.
It’s just, for me, there’s no emotional connection to him .. and I don’t think there would be either if he wasn’t married. I’m usually the one who gets attached when it’s only casual, so this is something new for me.
Anyway, I’ve purposely not seem him the past few weeks because of all that.. I need to break things off with him I suppose, but just don’t want to hurt his feelings either.
I know, I’m a softie. Any advice out there?